Saturday, September 19, 2015

It's Okay To Stray, But Don't Get Lost

     I've been in school for just over a month now, and honestly I didn't plan to want to be as, well, social as I am now. In my past two years of high school, it never seemed that important to constantly be with friends or boys, but now I suddenly feel like it's everything. For all the teenagers reading this, please take advantage of being being young. Go to that party and have a great time, or maybe you'll have a horrible time, you'll still learn from it. Go out with that cute person in your classes because maybe they're the one, or maybe you'll end up heartbroken and that's still okay. Why? Because it's more experiences and feelings that you can think about when you're older and if you like writing, you can use it in your writing.
     So, I'm going to get a little personal here. Recently I started talking to a guy that I had been school friends for a pretty long time and even though it was only for a couple weeks before it ended, I saw myself change a little. And when it ended, I realized how much I regretted my "change." Writing has been my life for so long and then when we were talking, I stopped writing for a week and a half. I'm actually really disappointed in myself for that. I also "dumbed myself down" when I talked to him because he wasn't in as advanced classes as I was and I didn't want to scare him away, haha. That is what really bugs me now, though, but I do find it a little funny, not sure why. I'm in AP Government, AP English Language, AP Capstone and Seminar, AP Physics, and French 2; I like school and learning and nerdy things. I was pretty much enlightened when I was sitting in AP Capstone and I was making jokes about the economic affects of the high prices of grapes. (How nerdy does that sound, right?) I saw that I didn't want someone who I couldn't make nerdy jokes with and who I could be smart with and not feel stupid about it.
     But, I don't regret it. If I hadn't of went through that, I never would have had that realization. I never would have seen what's really important to me in friends, boyfriends, and myself. Yes, I really liked this guy, but I see now that maybe he just wasn't right for me. The right person wouldn't distract me from my goals and make me feel wrong for being smart, though I'm not blaming him.
     Bad days are guaranteed to happen, too. Don't let those discourage you either. Wednesday, two weeks ago, I got a 64% on my AP Lang test because I didn't circle the answers, got a new seating chart in my French class so I had to sit next to the jerkiest, most arrogant boy I've ever met, and the guy I liked told me he didn't want a relationship. All in one day. There's going to be some pretty bad times, but they're only there to test you and remind you what you're really here for.
          The moral of my little story is: it's okay to stray, just don't get lost. What I mean is that, although it's great for you to spend as much time as possible with friends and make as many memories and experiences as you can, don't lose track of what you really want out of life. Experiences are what help you develop as a person and a writer, and you need to develop to become the best person you can be. However, you can't let that get in the way of your aspirations and dreams. Don't let people get in the way of what you want. If someone is holding you back from your full potential, kick them to the curb. There's always more friends and fish in the sea, and you'll find the right ones when you're doing what you love because they'll have the same interests as you. Don't be afraid to join clubs or try out for teams or talk to people you've never met. Everyone is in the same boat as you. Don't forget that. I turned seventeen yesterday, and look at all this elder wisdom I've already gained ;)

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